is that every once in a while you can get a FANTASTIC idea for a post that you just know would really capture the essence of you OR is something you know that you have to share with the world OR is something that might actually interest your readers/the world (one would hope). And then you go and do about 80 million other things, go to sleep and then the next day at around 10:30pm right before you go to sleep you decide to do your blog post.
Ahem.
As you can imagine, this isn't working out so well for me right now. I'm a wee bit tired and all my amazing ideas I imagined yesterday are gone. So why didn't I just do it yesterday? Plain laziness. And now this blog post, much like my others is just going to be an exercise in being trite.
So I'm going to try and maybe type down some of these actual important thoughts I was having. It's important because well, blogging is a form of diary-keeping, as I was advised in Camilla Morton's A Year in High Heels. And since I think that book is brilliant and I'm trying to live my life by adhering to its rules of fabulosity ala Kimora Lee Simmons, I've decided that I must try to inject some actual emotion and realness into my blog.
The first thing is that recently I've been feeling like my life has been passing me by. I'm sure it was prompted by the fact that I was at home for two whole weeks which wasn't too hot. Now that I'm back at work I've realized that although I love my colleagues and the environment, the job itself is too administrative and that I need more of a challenge. Hence the masters plan. But then there's also the fact that I just don't get out that much. I have 3 friends in this country and we hardly ever hang out. It's also not that level of friendship where you share everything, like all your fears, your family problems, all the crazy messed up insecurities in your mind. And I think the absence of that kind of friendship, here in the same country as me, means that there's a bit of a void in my life. But then on the other hand my family is here which I obviously didn't have at McGill which created a whole bunch of other issues which only Gilda, the wonder therapist, could help me deal with.
BTW I'm listening to Luda's Battle of the Sexes, it's not bad, kind of bangin'.
And then there's the whole I don't have a boyfriend thing. At this point it's becoming a bit of a tick-tock issue because there doesn't seem to be a solution in sight. Because my parents don't know people, my brothers don't know people they could potentially introduce me to and my friends... what friends?! So as you can imagine the situation is just DIRE. Which is freaking me out on so many levels. It's one thing to pretend being ok with being single for the rest of your life and then a whole other thing to ACTUALLY be single.
Like right now I'm feeling so AHHHHHHHH about the whole situation that I'm actually messaging some random person who accidentally messaged me because he thought I was his friend. And just because I happen to be Indian and he's Indian we're not in the midst of a texting conversation. I know! I'm going to tell him to go away in about two seconds.
But you see?! What I've been reduced to?
I also feel like this intense in my bones boredom that has pervaded my entire being. Probably because everyday I go to work, watch a bit of tv, read a bit of a book and sleep. On weekends I do the same exact thing, without the work bit.
See. Dire.
A plan must be set in motion to break me out of this rut. But what? I'll figure it out. (my new catchphrase btw)
Update. I just told my messager that I think he might be a serial killer. At least I know how to have fun. Hee hee.
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