A day in the life of Back Pain Induced House Arrest Dini

Wake up. Drink Apple Cider Vinegar and Manuka Honey. Do Breathing exercises. Lie back down for a while. Take a shower. Eat 2 eggs and fruit. Lie down somemore. Use the heat pack on my back. Do stretching. Check my email. Look at make-up blogs. Lie down. Heat Pack. Stretching. Eat lunch. Lie down. Heat Pack. Stretching. Look at fashion blogs. Lie down. Heat Pack. Stretching. Eat dinner. Watch Criminal Minds/Bones/House/Got to Dance/Glee. Lie down. Heat Pack. Stretching. Sleep.

A little sad, I know. I'm kept sane by awesome Mom and Dad. Also making lists for Singapore help, so far I've established that I really need a fly swat (roaches)and a spray bottle to put water and soap in (rooches - do you know that they breathe through their skin?? They die if they are sprayed by soap!)

I have rediscovered all my favorite blogs tho - which is always good :)

Ooh and I ordered a MacBook Pro! Coming Wednesday, can't wait.

Feelin like Switzerland!

Ahoy! I decided that I should do a blog post BUT it turns out after days of me being frustrated at everyone in my path and a tension filled house I am now completely just at peace and kind of want to sleep - BUT I swore that I would use this blog to record things even if they are tiresome and mundane so...

I finally finished reading The Swan Thieves, and it was really good. It took me forever but I think that's just because the pace of the book was generally slow. I didn't have very high hopes for it because I really disliked Kostova's The Historian but this book was different. Though it was as contrived as her first book I just really enjoyed the story and the characters and the way the whole mystery unfolded. I definitely also had the urge to figure out if the historical figures in the novel are real (they're not) and if basically I could cross reference it in any way against history (doable). I think Kostova did a much better job of not making the story too academic which is what I think was the main flaw of The Historian. Reviewers however disagree and fault her prose and her characterization but I'm very forgiving of those kinds of flaws in text so I guess I didn't notice.

I have not found out about Mandarin classes yet. I know! And I haven't called Sra or emailed my old Malay teacher or other people... I'm putting it off. I don't know why. Sometimes I think I just feel like God, It's going to be so awkward I don't want to do this, so I just FORGET even though I wouldn't usually. My subconscious is totally helping myself sabotage myself. Bad Dini. But I must get in touch with people soon so that I don't end up a spinster with 10 cats. I wouldn't mind a cat though.

Man, I really don't have much to say! This is bad. I really want to do a huge blog post on all the make-up I want to buy and my favorite make-up bloggers but I'm way too sleepy. I know that I need to go to bed.

Oh and today I ate lunch with my mum today so I'm not a COMPLETE loser.

I really wish I had it in me to do a huge blog post right now...

BUT I CAN'T. I'm just too bloody sleepy. I had this whole plan about how I wanted to write about how I'm so much better, list all the make-up I'm dying to buy, maybe even do a review on the one Lancome Juicy Tube I do own and even write a bit about how there's some serious drama, like always, going on at home.

But really all I want to do is get ready for bed and read more of The Swan Thieves. And the sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

Operation: Turn My Frown Upside Down

It has been a tough couple of days. I know that in my last post, or wait, last, last post I touched on how I feel like my life is passing me by, I have no friends, basically that my life sucks. And then I resolved that I would find a way to break out of my rut.

Which I did. Well kind of.

First, I felt really sorry for myself. Became borderline depressed. Was not able to retain a smile on my face at work which is really unacceptable for me. And then my lunch partner, who I honestly am really sick of, wanted to stop having lunch with me, probably because I've been kind of passive aggressive to her and just disinterested, which made me a bit lonely and sad because now I have NO ONE to eat with. Which is mildly depressing when lunch is usually the bit you're supposed to look forward to at work. But no, I look forward to the work.

And then I thought about how I basically haven't done anything much in life, despite being relatively smart. That I'm not really living up to my potential. And that I honestly feel like I'm just sad and lonely.

I managed to snap myself out of that funk though and really thought about it and figured out that the best way to get over it is to actually do something and to get busy. So here was the plan:

1. Get back in touch with people from WAO, do some volunteer work on the weekend
2. Join a salsa class
3. Look up potential dream companies/careers with L'oreal, etc.
4. Plan a vacation
5. Work out everyday
6. Do Back exercises everyday
7. Actually DO work at work instead of Googling or reading Beauty Blogs
8. Try to find a new lunch partner/be brave about eating alone

I did brilliantly yesterday. I e-mailed WAO people, sent my Masters recommendations off, DID work at work, was ok about eating alone.

Today was an EPIC fail. No one emailed me back. I realized I can't do salsa because my back still isn't up to it. Got irritated at my Dad because he wants to stay in an apartment in Singapore instead of a hotel. Did not work out. Was not great at work. Still have no lunch partner. Had to eat alone hunched over a novel.

And mostly I'm just very angry and very frustrated. Frustrated that I just can't seem to get out of this. Frustrated that I can't seem to make friends. Frustrated that I am not getting enough out of my job. And I'm mostly just angry that I'm frustrated and angry at everything. I just can't seem to be happy anymore and I don't know why.

I don't want to be difficult with my parents, I want to be good at work, I want to be nice and peaceable and lovely to be around.

Maybe it's just my way of telling myself that I've taken it easy for too long and that something needs to be done. I just need to find a way to be at peace with myself while I get there.

Which is why I'm writing this now. Diane von Furstenberg once said that, if you keep a diary, it will keep you." And I'm hoping to God that this keeps me because I feel like I'm going insane and that no one is helping because they can't and also because I don't want them to.

It's funny, the first year of my blog I literally could not put anything personal down. Now that it's been a year I'm pouring out my actual emotions. It mirrors the way I am with people. Very friendly, cheery and carefree initially and then later, the real messy, moody me comes out.

I better go. I think I am feeling better. Like the word vomit on this webpage is enough to stave off the madness. I hope so anyway.

The thing about blogging...

is that every once in a while you can get a FANTASTIC idea for a post that you just know would really capture the essence of you OR is something you know that you have to share with the world OR is something that might actually interest your readers/the world (one would hope). And then you go and do about 80 million other things, go to sleep and then the next day at around 10:30pm right before you go to sleep you decide to do your blog post.

Ahem.

As you can imagine, this isn't working out so well for me right now. I'm a wee bit tired and all my amazing ideas I imagined yesterday are gone. So why didn't I just do it yesterday? Plain laziness. And now this blog post, much like my others is just going to be an exercise in being trite.

So I'm going to try and maybe type down some of these actual important thoughts I was having. It's important because well, blogging is a form of diary-keeping, as I was advised in Camilla Morton's A Year in High Heels. And since I think that book is brilliant and I'm trying to live my life by adhering to its rules of fabulosity ala Kimora Lee Simmons, I've decided that I must try to inject some actual emotion and realness into my blog.

The first thing is that recently I've been feeling like my life has been passing me by. I'm sure it was prompted by the fact that I was at home for two whole weeks which wasn't too hot. Now that I'm back at work I've realized that although I love my colleagues and the environment, the job itself is too administrative and that I need more of a challenge. Hence the masters plan. But then there's also the fact that I just don't get out that much. I have 3 friends in this country and we hardly ever hang out. It's also not that level of friendship where you share everything, like all your fears, your family problems, all the crazy messed up insecurities in your mind. And I think the absence of that kind of friendship, here in the same country as me, means that there's a bit of a void in my life. But then on the other hand my family is here which I obviously didn't have at McGill which created a whole bunch of other issues which only Gilda, the wonder therapist, could help me deal with.

BTW I'm listening to Luda's Battle of the Sexes, it's not bad, kind of bangin'.

And then there's the whole I don't have a boyfriend thing. At this point it's becoming a bit of a tick-tock issue because there doesn't seem to be a solution in sight. Because my parents don't know people, my brothers don't know people they could potentially introduce me to and my friends... what friends?! So as you can imagine the situation is just DIRE. Which is freaking me out on so many levels. It's one thing to pretend being ok with being single for the rest of your life and then a whole other thing to ACTUALLY be single.

Like right now I'm feeling so AHHHHHHHH about the whole situation that I'm actually messaging some random person who accidentally messaged me because he thought I was his friend. And just because I happen to be Indian and he's Indian we're not in the midst of a texting conversation. I know! I'm going to tell him to go away in about two seconds.

But you see?! What I've been reduced to?

I also feel like this intense in my bones boredom that has pervaded my entire being. Probably because everyday I go to work, watch a bit of tv, read a bit of a book and sleep. On weekends I do the same exact thing, without the work bit.

See. Dire.

A plan must be set in motion to break me out of this rut. But what? I'll figure it out. (my new catchphrase btw)

Update. I just told my messager that I think he might be a serial killer. At least I know how to have fun. Hee hee.

Chickenpox Quarantine: Day 3 & 4

Yeah, so, blogging on Saturday didn't quite happen so I'm making it a joint update for the past two days. I actually accomplished some stuff I was supposed to do, I've made this huge list of things to do while I'm quarantined - so let's get started on what I got started on:

1. I read Lisa Jewell's The Truth About Melody Browne. My mum and dad bought it for me since I'm stuck at home. It was actually very good, very poignant and different from most chick lit. But then again most of Lisa Jewell's books are like that. I was reminded of why I like her books so much, except I don't think it's going to get reread as much as the Shopaholic books or like a pure fluff love story simply because it actually has more depth.

2. Did more typing of mum's quizzes and tests. Again, I'm just glad that I can be of help, you know?

3. Furiously websurfed through all my favorite beauty blogs, I think my fav of the moment is Make Up and Beauty Blog. The blogger, Karen, is truly a woman after my own heart in every way. Her humor, her writing style and of course the fact that she actually wears a variety of make-up - not just like nude lips and nude eyes.

4. Watched Max Payne last night on TV. It was quite entertaining, kind of ridiculous but hey, Mark Wahlberg looked good. Actually a little too good for a dude who's still pining his dead wife but... you know, whatever.

5. I read InStyle's April Color Issue this morning and it was Fabu! I completely take back what I said about Ariel Foxman because it is an awesome issue, on par with the fantastic last year's Color Issue with Salma Hayek on the cover. This issue has Gwen Stefani on the cover and she looks AMAZING, outside and in the mag as well.


6. I watched the Ugly Betty episodes of "Fire and Nice", "All the World's A Stage" and "Million Dollar Smile". I had forgotten how lovely and lighthearted the show is and also how much I like it. Justin kissed a boy which is awesome and about time! Plus Austin is a seriously cute kid. I'm also very glad that Betty's braces are off, I know that you know she's getting way too hot/isn't the point of the show that she's ugly? But you know what? I'm happy that she's finally getting made over because it's ABOUT TIME.

7. Majorly revamped my filing system for expenses, banking, job information, tax information, etc. etc. It looks fabu and I'm very proud of myself - that I actually had the patience to do it basically.

That's about it - I'm going to go to bed now and go see the doc tomorrow morning and see what she says about my pox situation. Wish me luck!

Itchin' the night away...

So. I have the chickenpox. Like actually, actually. It is ridiculous because firstly, I never actually thought I could get it since I dodged the bullet once when I roomed with Vicky on a trip to Greece and Turkey and she got chicken pox immediately after and I was fine. Mostly because I had had the chicken pox vaccine when I was around 11. Turns out that damn vaccine is temporary. So here I am 23, with chickenpox. So far its on my back and chest. Hopefully it will stay confined there, I'm guessing any new pocks are going to be cropping up in these next few days.

My doctor told me that it was like a compulsory holiday. Which would be fine if I was not confined to my room and compulsively washing my hands every few minutes. Which I am. I'm guessing I'm going to be out of commission for about two weeks which is what my doctor predicts. I'm not actually that sick, I'm mostly just nauseous and have a mild fever. Man. I guess it could be worse. Nothing that major is going on at work and I guess I needed a holiday so I should be happy I guess.

I've decided that I need a bit of a plan for the next couple of days to keep myself from gouging my eyes out so here it is:

To do list:
Watch An Education
Watch The September Issue
Watch Broken Embraces
Watch Brothers
Start doing some scrapbooking
Clean obscenely messy room
Figure out a good, new filing system for documents
Don't scratch pox
Find a new series to watch - just got done with Secret Diary of a Call Girl Season 3
E-mail people
Do my budget
Figure out what summer make-up will be worth treating myself with
Blog daily

Since I'm basically forced to stay in my room with no entertainment other than that of the internet and my laptop I might as well blog. About stuff. Like maybe what I'm up to for the day. Or ooh, maybe I could do a daily recap like, "Chickenpox Quarantine: Day 1". K good idea. I am a genius! Well not really it took me about 3 days to figure out that I had the chickenpox even though my colleague sitting behind me has been home sick with it for two weeks. Good one.

Sorry I haven't been updating but...

I am actually on semi bed rest (ie I can sit for meals and walk to where I'm going to eat, at all other times I lie down) because I'm experiencing a lot of back pain. Due to me recently discovered slip disc and some other fun complications.

So I'm standing as I type this. I am getting better, but bear with me as I have Singapore pics and fun day out with Meg pics that I'm going to post. Just not right now.

Oh and Meg has this fantastic blog which I'm mentioned in, it's called Where in the world is meg?! and it details her nine months around the world. Check it out.

Flavor of the Week: What the?

So I googled my blog because I'm a jackass and I couldn't remember the URL and apparently I've never typed it into my browser so it doesn't know it automatically - ANYWAY- I googled my blog and found out that one of my Flavors of the Week had like 20 comments on the damn thing.

Which Flavor of the Week? The Cam Gigandet one. What the-why?

WTF?

I read the comments and figured out it's because I said that Cam was hotter than Rob (Robert Pattinson) and cleaner and then I guess some people got really offended and kept commenting. People can get really worked up about Robert Pattinson. I mean seriously. I would say some stuff about the fact that he seems a little unhinged from his GQ interview and again that he's weird looking in real life BUT I mean I'm still TOTALLY crushing on him, so I can't say that his charm is completely lost on me. Then again I am a 12 year old girl so that shouldn't be surprising. Actually I'm 22. Anyway.

So yes, Flavor of the Week, actually of last week, my own blog post. Now who should I talk about...

Calling all Name-callers!

Hi Hi everyone, so according to my poll most of you people don't REALLY care what I call you. But since it seems like it's half/half split on the first name or crazy nickname, I'm trying to think about crazy nicknames for y'all. So far I have...

Actually I'm a little embarrassed about the names I have so far, since they are basically testament that I have no imagination. I was thinking about just calling you guys like, the Canadian/the German/the whatever, but that's not crazy and some of you guys double up in terms of nationalities. And then SM wants to be all anonymous and SM soooo.... Here's what I think so far - also, if you want me to take your name off this list, pls email me, and I will do it.

Okay and the picture was because I love ALIAS and... it is a lame way of including a picture, OK?!

Laetitia -Le Directrice (in case you guys don't know, Lae is a successful free lance director)

Ching Wen - Astroboy (Ching Wen works in Astro)

Preetha - TheWiseOne, QuidProQuo, I'm sorry but someone has to help me with this.

Katie - IHEARTAFRICA (Katie you know you deserve this because you've studied African stuff, you currently live in Africa, you wanna help Africa, I mean dammit why can't you be like the rest of us and pretend it doesn't exist?!)

Priscilla - Honky? I'm sorry nothing but racist nicknames are coming to mind right now.

SM (she has red hair and lives in Perth) - S&M? No??

Ali - Baby Kangaroo (As taken from your blog)

Nick - oxfordactivist (shoutout to Nick's smartness!)

Elise - yojamerican (Mixture of "yoja" the word for girl in Korean and American)

Alex - NeoGerman (Alex, help me with this one, what should I call you?)

Noah - OneOutofTen (In case you're wondering what this would be about, basically once Mr. Webber was all like, "Noah tries to be funny, and 9 out of 10 times he fails, but once every 10 times, he's really funny!")

Kyle -NYUKid (Because he's in NYU and will always be a kid to me!)

SusieQ - will remain as is :)

Actually apart from you guys I can't think of anyone who ACTUALLY read my email and will look up my blog but you know I'm thinking up nicknames anyway:

Jessica - whitemexican (For all the times people disbelieve you're Mexican...)

Nas - ANANASSSSSSSSSSSS

Marissa - reluctantjap? My god you're so going to kill me for that.

I would write the names of people at work on this blog but I feel like I pretty much can't do that... I think when I leave the current job I'm at I will give it to my colleagues here, but deffers not to my new colleagues.

Anyway help me with this! Post your suggestions please!

Hi guys!

So I decided to get a blog like... a month ago. And I posted these like half assed posts which basically weren't very me and weren't very interesting, and so I realized that I, inherently, want attention and recognition so I decided to make this blog about stuff I do and invite all my friends from all over the world to read it. Because honestly writing individual e-mails are kinda hard considering I actually work everyday. That doesn't mean I'm never going to write you an individual e-mail, it just means that general stuff will be on this blog.

I got the idea to do this blog from the Washingtonienne girl, Jessica Cutler, who was an aide in the White House or something and wrote this blog for 14 days about her sex life with different people in the White House, and then people found out who she was and then she was fired. Okay so I don't want to be her exactly but she said that she started the blog because she was getting tired of e-mailing her friends and she wanted to keep them informed about her sex life. Don't worry I won't be informing you about my non-existent sex life. Also just to clarify, the reason why I googled her at all is because apparently Sarah Jessica Parker is producing a show called Washingtonienne which is based on Cutler's book - so yes that is why I am now here.

So! Please read this and bookmark this and make me feel loved and I will try to keep this updated as much as possible.

Thanks! Love!